Monday, 4 July 2016

Gone for Good.


My husband died once before, in the Spring of 1990.  Our travel agency was doing well; we had caught the beginning of the tourist boom and had, for the first time in either of our lives, some spare cash.  Teo decided he wanted a proper motor bike so he found a Honda 650 in Izmir and went up on the bus to collect it. As he was riding home past Bafa Lake, he took a twisty turn too fast, skidded on gravel and crashed off the road into a deep ditch.  I was at home making dinner when I got a phone call (land line remember - no mobiles in those days) telling me that my husband had crashed his bike and was dead.  The dinner burnt as I sat on the floor trying to catch my breath. I was searching through the address book, looking for his brother's phone number when I heard a throaty rumble outside and a scratched, torn and muddy Teo walked through the front door.   He had been helped by a farmer on a tractor to pull the bike back on to the road and was waiting roadside for a truck to pass to hitch a ride with the bike back to Izmir. He had scribbled our home number on a piece of paper and asked the farmer to ring and tell me he wouldn't be back that night.  That piece of paper had obviously passed though a few hands before the much embellished message was relayed.  As he waited by his mangled new purchase, he decided to see if it would still start and it did, so rather than going back to Izmir, he rode it all the way back to Bodrum with buckled handlebars.  
I'd like to say that I gave him a wonderful welcome when he walked though the door, but I didn't. I'm embarrassed to admit that I was furious with him for putting me though half an hour of anguish and if I'd had a stick to hand, I would probably have hit him with it. Luckily there was no stick and he survived for another 26 years  - until Friday morning.  There will be no reprieve this time, I was holding his hand when he died. He won't be walking through the door again. 

41 comments:

  1. Ah Annie. I remember you telling me about the motorbike incident. How lucky to have had another 26 years together. My thoughts are with you and Esi at this very sad time. Rest in Peace Teo xxx

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  2. Gone....but he'll never be forgotten Annie xxx

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    Replies
    1. We have some good memories together, don't we.

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  3. Sevgili Annie... I'm so sorry... Thinking about you since Friday... Good old memories I have. Emine

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  4. You are quite amazing, Annie. Wonderful story but this time sadly no happy ending. Başın sağ olsun. I think the Turkish words of condolence are the most fitting. RIP Teo.

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    1. Lots of happy stories to keep me going

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  5. Those extra 26 years may have been a gift but I guess even if they were doubled they wouldn't be enough. You are in my thoughts.

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    1. Time to create new stories now, Mary

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  6. So sad to hear about your husband. Thank goodness his first death was just a misunderstanding so you had 26 more years together. Sending you a hug.

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  7. Başınız sağolun. I am in tears reading this I cannot imagine the pain and heart ache you are feeling. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.

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  8. I am so very very sorry for your loss. Karen xxxx

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    1. I know you have been through this and come out stronger - I'll hope for the same

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  9. Thinking of you and Esi and sending much love. I am so sorry for your loss, what a charismatic man and beautiful story...

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  10. We are so very sorry for your loss....

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    1. Thanks Helen - Your stories will keep me upbeat.

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  11. I am filled with sadness for you.

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    Replies
    1. Still lots of life for us to live .

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  12. So very sorry to hear of your loss. Başiniz sağolsun.

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  13. Padddy Hartnett5 July 2016 at 00:18

    A perfect post. You have a wonderful way with words. We're thinking of you and Esi.

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  14. A beautiful story ...

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    1. Ha! those are not the words I used at the time.

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  15. Sevgili Annie çok üzgünüz. Sana sabırlar diliyoruz.

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  16. . . memories - that's immortality in a word!

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    1. His old friends have been posting such wonderful old photos. Esi and I have been enjoying looking back at the Teo we didn't know.

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  17. Sevgili, dearest Annie, so very sorry for your loss dear friend, basiniz sagolsun.. What a fine man he must have been; memories are always with you, I wished I would be there by you at least I cook and run errands.. You are in our thoughts, please know you are so welcome anytime to Surrey for a little change of air. Do hope to see you in Aug. Sending you and Esi much love, cok sevgilerimle, Ozlem xoxox

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    1. Hope you can come and stay one night in August.

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  18. A wonderful story, Annie. I'm so glad you and Teo had those 26 happy years together since then and wish you could have had many more. My heart goes out to you and Esi in your loss.

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  19. Hello Annie I have never met you but enjoy reading your blog, I was so sad to read about the death of your husband and send my condolences. It was very kind of you to share your memories.

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    1. Thank you Maureen - let's meet up one day. I'm very fond of Bitez; Teo and I got married on the beach there in 1984.

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  20. Dear Annie, A beautifully remembered time. It is such a gift to experience such love. Our sincerest sympathy and warmest regards, Mark and Jolee

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